I have been pretty absent lately on the blog. My shoulder is finally recovered to the point that it doesn't scream when I try to type. I have also been just ready and listening to my family as they continue to struggle thru this difficult year.
I am good. I have tried to be supportive and loving. Sometimes I am not so good at it, but I still try. We have had a tough year. Tom and Sue are working together and apart to become healthier contributors to our family. I did the therapy and as much continued care as I could muscle.
When I saw Joyce's response to "It's All About Control", I was taken aback. I have never thought to be jealous of Tom's relationship with Sue. He isn't jealous of my relationship with Sue and I don't think Sue is jealous of Tom and I. The 3 of us have been together for almost 11 years. Certainly in the beginning, I felt threatened and jealous, but in a poly relationship, nobody moves faster than the slowest member. And I was pretty slow back then so they were considerate of my needs. And I finally caught up and found my better half, Sue. We have both said it before, the fact that we share a brain.....we also share Tom.
So no, I am not jealous. I worry that Sue is not as gentle with herself as she should/could be. I worry that they don't take the time to just be and let things go.
I want us to be together forever because I do not think I could live without either of them.
Well, I will go back to my sling and Percocet. Talk to you all later.
T
Thanks for taking the time to write and reassure a perfect stranger that you are indeed alright! There was so little said about your feelings and relationship within the triad, it just appeared to me, as an outsider looking in, you were a missing member.
ReplyDeleteYour statement "...in a poly relationship, nobody moves faster than the slowest member." made a lot of sense. I might not understand the need for a poly relationship, but you are to be admired for your strength in making it work.
Tom needs to reflect on just how lucky he is to have the love of two good women. Women who have stuck with him through the drinking. It is a very very difficult thing to stay when the relationship becomes skewed and unreal because of alcohol. When the drinking stops you have to rediscover and connect with what was there before and build anew. However the relationship will never be the same as it once was. Enough said, Been there done it.
Thanks again Teresa for responding. Sue your journey of self discovery will be successful regardless of which way you choose to go.
Wishing you all the very best.
Joyce
Glad to hear the shoulder is healing and sending hugs!
ReplyDeletemouse
Glad to hear from you...I have worried about you at times just because we don't hear as much from, about you. I did suspect that perhaps you are better at riding waves than anyone else in your family. If I'm right - I wish you could teach me that skill. It's going very unevenly trying to teach myself!
ReplyDeletean extremely gentle hug from my side of the planet :)
ReplyDelete