There are many ways to identify where the power resides in a relationship. It isn't nearly as complicated as we sometimes make it. Consider...- In a household, like ours, where there are cats, who manages the litter box(es)?
- Who cooks... and who cleans up after the cooking?
- Who tends to the laundry?
- Who mops the floors and scrubs the toilets?
- Who changes the bedlinens?
- Who makes the coffee?
I am certain there is more. Feel free to add to the list if you are so inclined.
I don't know how any of that equates to power exchange nor imbalance. My Master/lover/Owner does all of these things when he sees the need. We dont have cats but we do have dogs, and he's as likely to feed and/or walk them as I am. But so are the adult children who still live with us. Same goes with some of the other stuff, but not all. I cook and clean afterwards, I handle most bathrooms, but I don't do the floors. He decided that is his domain, and he doesn't do it as.often or as thoroughly as I'd like, but he does it because.its.what he wants to.do when he wants to do it, and it suits him. I've had to learn to accept his way there.
ReplyDeleteI do the laundry almost exclusively. I'm out of town this week and made sure all the laundry was done, folded and put away before I left. I plan the meals (sort of - don't always cook, but try to prepare for guests in my absence), and coffee? Keurig is our friend. We both fill the water tank as needed. I keep the coffee choices supplied.
ReplyDeleteI could go.on. I pay the bills. I remind him about important things that apply to.his kids. But that's just normal life, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteHe works his ass off. I work too, and am curremtly the primary breadwinner money wise, but I don't put anywhere near the heart that he does Into making us work. He continually goes above.and beyond
So, for me, the power exchange exists because he values showing his commitment to us. He is always the strongest man I've ever known.
I apologize for the periods everywhere. I'm typing from my phone and apparently periods are the thing :/.
ReplyDeleteInteresting post...
ReplyDeleteMost of the cooking is mouse's job. Kiddo empties and loads the dishwasher, he also cleans up after the dogs and scoops the litter box for the cat (but really feels since the dog adopted said cat it should be his job to eat it or something -- true).
Everything else is pretty much on mouse. Except on Fridays when we have much more to do before lighting candles -- then everyone (including Daddy) has tasks to do.
Hugs,
mouse