Wedding

In just a few days, I'll get on a plane and fly west for my son's wedding. An occasion of great joy. I'll be gone just two nights, and back here on Sunday afternoon.

There'll be practically none of my family there as far as I can tell -- not my mother (she'll be on a cruise), neither of my two brothers, maybe not my daughter... I believe that my former husband's family may turn out in force, but my own folks will be notably absent. That's, perhaps fodder for another post (if I can figure out how to do it without sounding snarky).

I'm terribly nervous about making this trip. It is odd.

I used to travel on my own all the time. Off on business on a regular basis. In and out of hotels and airports in strange cities all over the country -- renting cars, and negotiating all the details of navigating my way around without blinking an eye...

But that was another lifetime. I was another person. I was in charge of everything then. I'm not that person anymore.

I haven't been on my own, by myself for a very long time. It is a daunting prospect. I'm significantly freaked out. I had a mini-meltdown yesterday. T took me under her wing and ushered me out shopping to fetch a decent wedding gift -- bless her. We came away with fabulous, wonderful goodies for the kiddos, and I was thrilled and glad, but I was utterly incapable of moving to it on my own.

I just have to get through the week; focus on my boy and his lady; get there, smile and hug; and get home.

swan