More silliness...
Not long after the adventures with THE CAMERA, there was Friday morning. He was chairing a meeting out of town. This time, it was T that got the frantic phone call at work -- It seems that He'd done His usual thing of puttering and poking about getting ready to go until He was way late leaving, and decided to take His portable electric razor with Him in the car and shave on the road. Now mind you, this is the razor that retails for a pretty penny($$$), and which T (brilliant bargain shopper that she is) located for about half price last Christmas. The thing is (well -- was) less than five months old...
So picture if you will, friends: The Master of our Domain, who never performs any of the functions of personal hygiene in any of the locations that one would expect such operations to occur, is driving along the road with His practically brand new, expensive electric razor, and decides that it needs to be divested of the whiskers that have accumulated in the head. Thinking quickly, He opens the car window, sticks the thing out the window pushes the button, flips the head, and the whole top flips off onto the road, as He drives along. TAH DAH!!! Insert assorted expletives here. He did go back and retrieve the parts and pieces, but I probably do not need to explain to you that the wonderful Christmas razor has passed from this world... So, He calls T (at work), and gives her the whole long story, and winds her all up about what is He going to do now until He can get another razor, and on and on and on... She told me that when He first called and started in, she really thought that He had crashed the car, He sounded so frantic. High drama. We have had discussion, in our nominally DD household, about this business. It is understood that He WILL wander the household while He gets ready to go. We just know that part of life is that we trail behind Him and retrieve His toothbrush and toothpaste and dental floss and combs and brushes and whatnot. HOWEVER -- the question has been asked (lightly but with arched brows and a bit of a "teacher" voice) whether it seems prudent to take the morning hygiene routine on the road in the future... Do ya' think? Mistress Trixie seems rather convinced that Master needs a spanking...
swan
So glad to hear some fun coming out - and as for the wandering around bit - the last two posts had me in stitches!!!
ReplyDeletePossibly electronically tag everything so that if he tries to wander out of the house with them he gets an electric shock? (Only a little one....although maybe ye could make it adjustable?) he he he
cuddlybum
Ahhhh....but she leaves out some of "Master's Tale of Woe".... He scoops up the offending bits and pieces, calls me in a dither, rushes home to suffer thru' a "normal" shave with gel and EVERYTHING! And what to his wandering eyes should appear but a 'lectric shaver of Swan's, whom HE holds to him dear....
ReplyDeleteoh, ok...I will stop the rhymes.
Now you have to realize that Swan has been trying to drain the battery on her razor. In the beginning, I would wander around her house trying to find the vibrator she had left turned on, just to find out that she had her shaver running on the bathroom counter trying to kill the battery. And now it is normal. I am no longer looking for her "granny cat" to come out of the bedroom with a cigarette and a smile.
Soooooo HE rushes home to shave and spies Swan's shaver. Snatches it and figures HE is saved. Starts shaving and FINALLY the battery dies!!!! Yes, you may insert man in suit and tie, with half shaved face, pounding His forehead on bathroom counter here...
Of course He had to finish with the gel and razor and was VERY late for the meeting that HE was chairing.
There is NO cure for this. Swan and I just wander from room to room picking up every manner of personal hygiene CRAP and smile sweetly and grumble amongst ourselves.
T
p.s.
I DO like cuddlybum's idea about the electronic tag...kind of like those dog collars that "ZAP" the dog when they stray too far....hummmmm...we may have something here.....