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We are three adults living in a polyamorous triad family. The content here is intended for an adult audience. If you are not an adult, please leave now.


A Foggy Glimpse of Our Current Reality

I am not able to bring myself to share my current reality in detail. I ran across a couple of poetry excerpts by Gjertrude Schnackenberg that resonate with our present reality.

"When love was driven back upon itself,
When a lapse where my life should have been,
Opened like a breach in the wall........."

and another:

"Possessed, but not in order to possess;
Selfsame, self-owned, self-given, self-possessed,
And all in play. But conquered nonetheless."

We three are together again. I was away for a bit. We have huge struggles and our lives are profoundly changed. I hope we will continue and believe we will out of determined love and pragmatic necessity. Perhaps someday we will feel able to tell the story of our last three weeks, but if so, that time is long into the future.

On a more concrete note, next Friday November 19, our t is going to have a total knee replacement surgery and much of our time, energy, and focus will center around her recovery, care, and rehabilitation from then through the first of the year.

I hope all our friends here are well. I have missed writing here and all of your input and support but absolutely cannot even begin to imagine writing about our present experience. Likely our journey regarding t's upcoming surgery will give us an important and dramatic series of experiences we will be able to share here.

Thank you for those who are hanging in with us through this time. Thank you for caring to send us support and for bothering to miss us.

All the best,



  1. I wish you all the best.
    I am going to put my 2 cents in about the knee replacement. I have friends and family, 5 of them, that have had this procedure. Three with fabulous success, two with, meh. The difference? t, you need to rock that rehab! Work as hard as your therapist will let you. It makes ALL the difference. Push through the pain and do it. You will be glad you did.

    Good Luck Herons!

  2. I'm glad you came back. I've missed you and worried a bit.

    You are under NO obligation to tell the whole story or any part of the story. We care, because we care about you, but there are no obligations here.

    Start again from today if you like. Write about t's knee or the weather or the books you read or whatever you choose if that makes it easier to start.

    Good luck to all of you.

  3. I am glad you are back, you have been in my thoughts. Good luck to t. abby

  4. Hugs to you all. You've been on my mind too, just hoping all was fine. Good luck to t on her knee step dad did the same and it was a long recovery, sending good thoughts that t's surgery and recovery goes better. I'm glad you're back...


  5. I'm also glad you're back; that is the important thing!
    I second the rehab part of knee replacement. I've not had one but know several who have and that rehab is so vital.
    Good luck~!

  6. Another candle holding space for the Herons here...I hope that you can find peace within yourselves and one another.

    T~I am going up to Wisconsin to help my mom post knee surgery. She is doing great...and very happy to be coming home.

    Love to you all....

  7. Impish12:09 PM

    Friends who care want nothing from you, care only for you. Please send special caring from me to Swan because I know if she is not writing, she is in a difficult place. Thinking of you all, and sending warm thoughts your way.

  8. caitriona3:08 PM

    I'd just like to echo what sin said. I'm keeping all of you in my thoughts.

  9. Concern and care winging by, from the far side of the planet...

  10. Been lurking here for a while, but just wanted to send you some good wishes, and say I'm glad to hear (read?) from you again.

    Stay strong, Herons, and wishes for a speedy recovery to T.

  11. Anonymous5:41 PM

    Thinking of you all..and special thoughts to T...Karen


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