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We are three adults living in a polyamorous triad family. The content here is intended for an adult audience. If you are not an adult, please leave now.

11/16/2010

Starting Again from Here

Disaster struck three weeks ago.  An array of events and circumstances came together at a single point in time, and before we knew about it, we were in way over our heads -- drowning.  And just like someone drowning, each of us has frantically and blindly clawed our way to the surface, heedless of the damage we might have been doing to those who would reach out to us.  We've reacted in fear and anger and frustration and hurt -- lashing out at one another.  Battling herons.

That is it.  There will be no further details here about the precise events that have so toppled our pleasant and peaceful lives.  For now, we think that we are a bit better.  A small bit calmer.  Beginning to heal and rebuild.  It is a tentative beginning and a precarious peace.  It is worlds better than the chaos that has swirled around us in the last weeks.

One of the delusions that has developed for us, over the years of writing here is the belief that we must examine and dissect every single event and share it in this place -- no matter the cost to us personally of doing that.  Not this time.  We are too tender.  Too fragile.  Too hurt.  So.  We will draw the curtains over the "story" of the last bit, and keep it to ourselves.  We will go forward -- starting again from here.  For those of you who are interested in following the path ahead with us, we will welcome your companionship.

swan

10 comments:

  1. It's just so good to hear your voice again...I find myself sighing in relief, even though I know that the very earth has been shaken.

    I hope both the storm and aftermath clear....it's too hard picture any other outcome.

    I wish you all peace and ease with one another.

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  2. Impish19:45 PM

    So glad to hear you here. I worry when the hurt is so deep that you lose your voice.

    I want only the best for you all. I think you are capable of getting to where you want to be if each of you is brave enough to put a bit of yourself out there. After all that has gone on lately, I think it's not surprising if you each "reacted in fear and anger and frustration and hurt". Perhaps it's been a long time coming after the stress you have all been through. I can only hope, as your family gathers 'round to support T through her surgery, that it will soon move far away.

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  3. Welcome back...it is good to hear from you!
    hugsssssss abby

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  4. Very wise. Sometimes it's best not to talk it all. Go slowly and take care of yourselves and each other if you can.

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  5. Sigh... life is so complex and hard to understand at times. Hope you guys are starting to make sense of things. I certianly understand your need for privacy.

    jojo

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  6. weirdgirl4:07 AM

    glad you are back. hugs to all xoxox

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  7. It is a shame that you would ever feel you owed anyone reading your words , more words.

    I don't keep a blog, maybe if I did , I'd understand your feeling.

    I'm just glad you are back and wish you all the best in healing and happiness.

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  8. Keep whatever you need to to yourselves....we'll still be here reading the rest. Hugs to you all.

    butterfly

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  9. Glad to know you're all on the path of healing.
    Glad to know you're keeping private matters private.
    Glad to join you in the journey forward.
    My admiration of you all, and the common ground we have that facilitates some of that admiration, does not require sharing the sordid details and nasty bits unless you benefit from that sharing.
    Frequently, I think we don't always benefit from hashing those things out publicly. Sometimes it really is best to let go of the drama.
    I wish for all of you peace and tranquility, understanding and compassion, letting go and lovingly moving forward.
    Tom, T, and Swan, you are loved, and that love is flowing toward you as quickly as the Universe can carry it from me to you.

    Tapestry
    xoxo

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  10. As always, you all have my best and brightest energy.

    As always, thank you for what you share here.

    And thank you too, for what you don't.

    Protecting yourselves and your relationships through silence is just as admirable and honest as full disclosure.

    ~Chloe

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