When my children were small, one of the favorite bedtime stories was The Velveteen Rabbit. I can't even begin to guess how many hours I spent with little ones curled in my lap, and at my side reading the story of how the toy made the journey to becoming real... Sometimes, as we tear through our days, scrambling to make all the pieces fit, and keep it all together, we lose track of how "real" our life together is. We get so caught up in the things we do to keep our life secure and safe and viable, that we sometimes come to believe that we are what the world would tell us -- "not real." Because that is the message that quite often comes to a family that is "alternative," and other than the norm that is thrust on us all. Especially in the environment that is so pervasive right now, it is easy to only hear the message that tells families that aren't "cookie cutter" styled to match up with what the conservative, fundamentalists would tell us is the "right way" to do it.
So, it was a real joy, this last weekend, to visit with friends who also live as a poly family. They came and visited and brought their whole clan. They arrived at our doorsteps -- grownups and kiddos; came right in, and settled right in, and were as right with us as could possibly be. The whole bunch of us all went back and forth just like we always do. Everyone found whoever they were comfortable to talk with as they were comfortable... Chatter and laughter was everywhere, as were people of all ages and sizes. And when the whole gang gathered at the great big dinner table, it was as natural as could be. What a gift! For all of us to be together and to know that we were each and all real and right.
No fairies came to visit. No special magic. Just people loving and caring for each other. And it was REAL.
swan
I would have to say that you were invaded! By a pack of road weary, dirty-messy aliens. But that's my opinion! Of course it was perfectly real, why would a pack of lil'ones who have three parents think it strange that one man would have two wives? To them, that is the way it is.
ReplyDeleteWe were honoured that you all opened your home to us. Young and old(er) alike, we were thrilled to be there and the question everyone (especially the pickle!) has asked is "When can we go back?"
We so enjoyed your hospitality and hope that we will be able to return and that y'all will be able to visit with us also :)
You are most certainly "real" and any standard that says otherwise is, well, wrong. I am so happy to be able to call you my friend, thank you.
magdala~
Dear Swan
ReplyDeleteIt is a genuine delight to hear about your joy at being with people who believe and live as you do.
I suppose I should get a Blog of my own because so much that you write brings thoughts and memories to my mind that cry out to be expressed.
My first exposure to The Velveteen Rabbit was in Casey House. (This is a famous and truly wonderful palliative care home for aids patients.). Casey House was not much loved by the young men I knew because no one, who was admitted there at that time, ever came out. The Velveteen Rabbit was far and away the most favourite book in the extensive library. I recall many peaceful hours spent reading it to one of my Boys. Life was very real for these young men and eagerly clung to.
I can sympathise with your anger against the abuse that the “conservative fundamentalists” heap upon the heads of anyone who dares to live a lifestyle that differs from the norm.
This attitude, however, isn’t confined to the conservative fundamentalists.
Yesterday we had convocation in one of the piss-aunt universities that nestle in the bosom of our fair city.
The powers that be had decided to offer an honorary doctorate to a woman who had dared to express an opinion that was contrary to gay marriage. – She had displeased the august body that directs the activities of the homosexual community by having an belief that disagreed with what they decreed to be politically correct.
The reaction was predictable. - Feeble minded professors denigrating the solemnity of the occasion by prancing around draped with the rainbow flag over there gowns. - Pinheaded youth yelling and shouting and waiving misspelled signs.
Make no mistake! Given the chance, this scum would have burned the lady at the stake.
It appears that ignorant intolerance isn’t confined to the conservative fundamentalist.
Jack
Swan, it's great that your family and Magdala's could get together, I'm glad that you had a such good time.
ReplyDeleteHugs,
Paul.
swan (and magadala if you read this)
ReplyDeletei am truly glad your families got to visit!!! what a treat!!! and can i say i am a wee bit jealous?? just a wee bit.. i am lucky to have met more than a few "friends" from blog land.. but still and all i wish i could meet you both !!
morningstar (owned by Warren)
What a wonderful post...glad you all had such a great time.....
ReplyDeleteBo
"No fairies came to visit. No special magic. Just people loving and caring for each other. And it was REAL."
ReplyDeleteAnd that is a magic all by itself. Thank you for sharing this. :-)