The Voice of God

Yesterday I was off to my state's capital. I have worked for the last 32 years as an advocate for the civil rights of marginalized populations, particularly those with disabilities. I was accompanied by a colleague on my staff who is someone who has a disability. We were going to testify before a legislative committee opposing a bill that would, if enacted, damage the ability of people with disabilities to live successfully in their communities. It was not one of the most major battles in the decades long quest to return people who 50 years ago we routinely incarcerated in state institutes from childhood until they died, to becoming our valued friends, neighbors, and co-workers. It was however a skirmish that would, if lost, be a setback that would have very real harmful consequences in some lives. So we were off to talk to our lawmakers about those effects.

Now I have to tell you that many people find standing at the podium before their legislators in a state house hearing room, dreadfully fearsome and anxiety provoking. I've had witnesses who were accomplished professionals who practically urinated themselves when their name was called and they walked to the podium, only to find their mouth had gone dry, and they could only recall half what they might say.

I was gong to speak but primarily I was providing context and background for the legislators to understand fully the testimony of my companion. He is a gentleman who has come to work in our field as an advocate and is someone who has cognitive disabilities. He is courageous and has testified several times before. Every time this has occurred before he has at the last minute made it to the podium with his testimony script shaking, faced the microphone, and at the last minute turned to me and whispered plaintively, "You read it." And as I read his "speech" he'd nod his head affirmatively as if to say this is my message to you.

Yesterday was different. We'd talked on the long drive there about how today he was going to testify. I'd written his testimony (he is only barely literate) but with his input and consent. The moment came. I'd arranged for us to be called together and we stood there as I spoke and then introduced him. I felt huge joy as he began to speak. He didn't follow his "script." He spoke of his truth and from his heart. He was powerful and compelling in his simple basic English and truth.

Then it happened. As he testified a voice on a loud speaker system boomed into the room. There was someone somewhere in the state house setting up a loud speaker system and as they tested it they must have hit the wrong switch and their test message was broadcast in our hearing room. It said very loudly "One, two, three testing......THIS IS THE VOICE OF GOD!"
My colleague stopped mid-syllable turning his eyes to heaven. He knew his audience were people of awesome power, but he had not expected God to be there. I whispered to him it was just a speaker system and someone making it work. He said, "No it's not. It's God!" He looked at the Charmian of the Committee and said "should I go on?" He said, "yes" so he continued but with a much more reverent voice. I know he believes that not only did we address this minor committee but that too God had been there. I felt like I was trapped in a scene from Forrest Gump.

My great joy is that he spoke.........himself. And I bet from now on he always will speak. What the heck! Once you've testified before God who can possibly intimidate you in future audiences?

Beyond that I was impressed, that I am old. I sat there in that hearing room wondering how many dozens of hearings I've attended over the years and the lady behind me introduced herself. She is the new legislative liaison for the state department our advocacy relates to. We will likely collaborate and at times cross swords. She is clearly in her early forties. She reminded me how she knew me. As I began this career in my twenties I used to attend as a consultant the Board of a rural county's advocacy agency comprised of families advocating for their children with disabilities. Their leader had a daughter who came with her to meetings, and who sat on the sideline, doing her homework, or who used to ride her skateboard in the hallway outside the meeting room. She is now the state department's legislative liaison and recalls me as the out of town "expert" who used to attend her mom's meetings. She clearly feels that in growing to work with me professionally she has "grown up," and grown up she clearly has. I am finding that this overlap of my past and present realities is making me realize the length of time I have been at this...and it is coming to be a long time.

It was a good day on many levels. I was reminded graphically that I am old, and we spoke with God.

All the best:)

Tom

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.