The comment that Hermione left just a day or so ago on the "As Promised" post struck a chord with me that has had me following several different thought paths, so let me see if I can make any sense of my thinking and put some sort of coherent response together here.
She wrote: Interesting that you posted those pictures, just when we have been having a lively discussion about words vs pictures on My Bottom Smarts.You are very brave!
Well, I am not the one who usually reads at "My Bottom Smarts." That's why it is listed under "Master's Links." So, I went and looked. It seems that there are a fair number of commenters there who are of the opinion that "pictures on blogs" are there "gratuitously." Fair enough. Everybody has their thing, and I can fully appreciate that looking at my naked ass is not everybody's cup of tea. Hey! I am a grown up with a well developed ego structure, and I "get" that my bare butt is not exactly on the national scenic tour. So... If my butt occasionally appears here for some of the world to see, what, if anything, does that mean?
Reasonable enough question to ask.
To begin with, I think it is important to understand that people write in this format for different reasons, and with significantly different goals and agendas. This has never been a blog that has had as its primary agenda to "drive traffic." I (and we) write my/our lives here. We don't tell fictional stories and we don't do "memes," and we sometimes leave the pages silent for long periods of time. It is all reflective of the real lives of real people. There is no fluff and there is no gloss. Those who have been reading for any time at all, know that it is possible to read for very long periods of time and hear very little about spanking, S/M, or alternative sexuality in any significant degree. In actual fact, if you are a longtime follower of The Heron Clan and/or The Swan's Heart, you probably know much more about menopause, hysterectomy, alzheimers, teaching, diabetes, knee replacement, polyamory, dealing with adult children, and our political and religious views than you do about our BDSM practices. Some part of our lives has to do with sadomasochism and M/s, and so I do get spanked. Once in a great while, as part of that, He will, on a whim, take some photos, and when He does, I will usually post them. I think that happens relatively rarely. People see my butt and my face at just about the same frequency. The photos are hardly gratuitous, in my view. They are part of the story that I and we tell here of what is happening in our lives.
Secondly, I think that pictures can tell stories, even as words can. I would defy anyone to say that I haven't told my story here with plenty of words -- over and over and over. I am sure that there are some who would be happy to say that I have spilled MORE than enough words over the years -- "PLEASE, SOMEBODY, SHUT THAT WOMAN UP!" So, for those who prefer words to pictures, there are plenty of words here I would think. But, now and then, an image can speak, if we have the vision to see what there is to be seen. I suspect that some see butt pictures and that is all they see. We are not accustomed in our society to confronting nudity, and so the human body displayed without clothing is shocking for some. That shock prevents us from being able to see beyond the obvious -- it is a naked ass!
For me the pictures that Hermione sees as perhaps controversial or daring or (at a minimum, brave) tell stories. Everyone seems to see them differently. Each time I look at them, I hear voices in my mind. I hear His disappointed response when He first saw them posted here: "Your ass is hardly red; only just pink -- I should have spanked you a lot harder and a lot longer!" I hear the questioning of a correspondent who asked, "Isn't it difficult for you to be that exposed and that vulnerable?" I look at them myself, and I see the aftermath of the battle; the total and complete physical surrender in every muscle. I see the faintness of the lines of the cutting and I feel pangs of distress at how faded that marking has become over the years.
Finally, I keep coming back to that "you are very brave" accolade. What is it that seems brave about having others see you naked? How is it that we imbue clothing with such symbolic power that the mere act of being revealed without it is an act of courage? I sleep naked. I have enjoyed vacations in naturist resorts where clothing is optional, and total nudity is the norm. I have spent a fair amount of time in public play venues where I have been entirely naked among large numbers of people. There is, perhaps, a time for appropriate personal modesty. Surely, I've seen the human form displayed in ways and in settings that I found cheap and degrading. However, I think that it is not so much a matter of what we show as it is a matter of who we are and how we feel about what we are doing when we are revealed to others with or without our clothing.
swan
I suppose in a society that is so focused on this odd concept of physical perfection- and the odder conception of perfection that we have- exposing ourselves without the "help" of clothing is kind of scary.
ReplyDeleteIn truth, I've wondered about your posting photos, but only because I know many who live in fear of being "outed" or recognized online. I don't question your choice or marvel at it because I assume the decision was made with all due consideration.
~Auor
I am in a vanilla relationship where we dabble in only the very lightest kink (small spankings and some light bondage). However, I have been reading BDSM blogs for four years, and I love them. It started with Mistress Matisse, and now I read almost every link on Kaya's blog. I love reading the words, and they have made me realize that I wanted just a small taste every once in a while. The life is not for me, but I respect it and love that people share their lives this way.
ReplyDeleteI think the pictures are great. They ground me, and they show me the reality of the lifestyle's that I am reading about. Without seeing any pictures, I imagine everything much darker and removed from the world that I live in. With the occasional picture, I have a reality check. I see that the lives and physical world of the blogger is the same once I live in, the activities are just different. I think showing pictures is probably a difficult choice for some, and a natural one for others. But I have never thought they are posted to shock or to brag. I see them only as another piece of the real life of the blogger, and that I have the privilege of seeing the world with details that cannot be conveyed in words.
I think that it takes away a piece of the fantasy, and replaces it with truth.
Dearest swan;
ReplyDeleteAgain your grace and education shine through your words. Each of them well placed and definitely well thought out.
Your subject today has brought a 'sore' subject to my thought process today and that is the lack of clothing that also enhances the lack of self esteem that i and most women create for themselves.
Raised in a very strict and religious upbringing, the idea that anyone would see me naked would be appalling and sex was meant to be only used for pro-creation.
As i got older, i found myself being extremely promiscuous with random men/boys just to get attention and feel the love that was lost growing up. i would do anything for someone to love me. I was lucky enough to come out of that healthy.
Now, a woman in her late 30' somethings, i have found that i have never really truly been free in my skin and hide a now very overweight frame behind tasteful clothes.
I have to think that commenter #1 has the same fear as i do, and that would be the fact that i would fear someone would identify me on the net (i work very closely with internet and have seen images come back to bite people in the butt many times) and yet even though the face of most images are cut out, my phobia of cameras continues to plague me. If a camera is out, i had better be behind the lens, not in front of it.
The reason?
To see and re-affirm my size, my low-self-esteem and so much more. The only pictures i DO like, are those of my neck up and ONLY after i have dabbled in my love for theatrical and dramatic make-up
So with that said, I most definitely have to admire your most care-free way of living. I am striving myself to get back to that, but with a touch of maturity and safety in mind.
You are an inspiriation.
Swan,
ReplyDeleteI assure you I did not mean to offend you, or to imply anything judgmental about you or your body by my use of the word 'brave'.
I would need to be feeling extremely brave to allow a picture of any part of my anatomy to appear on a blog of any description. But that's just me. And I have also not had any experience with public nudity, other than in a fitness centre locker room.
I always enjoy your eloquent posts. I am very much a word person, not a picture person, and that's really what was at the heart of my comment.
Hugs,
Hermione
Just a quick word to welcome those of you who are new here, or at least newly "visible." Welcome Auor, stiffa, and orchid. It is nice to "meet" you.
ReplyDeleteI assure you that I and we are cautious about what we reveal here at some level. On the other hand, there is the awareness that if someone sincerely decided to find any one of us, based on what we write here, it would not be a difficult task. The reality is that choosing to venture into the cyber realm has as part of the bargain a certain level of exposure risk. That risk needs to be understood and "coped" with at the outset or the whole enterprise is one of self-deception.
Hermione -- please be assured that I am in no way offended by your comments. Believe me, if I were to take offense by anything you had said, you would not have to wonder or guess about that. Clearly, you haven't been reading here very long, or you would know that folks who step on my toes get told where to get off in no uncertain terms. So, no worries. Welcome to our world... stop by often.
swan