I Made It One More Time:)

Today is a milestone. 61 years ago today in a birth that was two months premature, and through which ordeal my mother and I both nearly died, I came into this life. I lived the first two months of this life in an incubator, a new medical innovation in 1949 neonatology, and a very risky proposition then. You see in that this was so new a practice, they had not learned yet what oxygen levels were healthy in incubation, or that if the oxygen mixture was too rich, it would burn out the optic nerve resulting in incurable life long total blindness, a condition called retrolentalfibroplasia or RLF. 50% of babies placed in incubation in 1949 and 1950 became suddenly and (seemingly to medicine then, unexplainably) blind, before they realized that too rich an oxygen mixture was the culprit. To this day the largest spike in the incidence of blindness is in those born in 1949 and 1950 due to RLF. I won that lottery. I did not develop RLF despite two months of incubation in 1949.

My parents were told I was not likely to survive my first year, then not likely to make it to age 4, then age 8 and so on. I was ten before I ever went two weeks without seeing some doctor. I beat all the odds and continue leading a life that defies what everyone says is what is expected in so many ways.

Today I officially enter my 60's. I am 61. Wow! I know that happens after surviving this interval of life but for me it feels like an achievement. I don't feel embarrassed about my advancing age, or consternated by how much nearer the eventual end of my life might be, I feel proud, elated, ecstatic to be here......to not only have survived but to be living the life I choose and that fulfills me.

Thank god for my parents who never gave up on me, for a Dr. named Vernon T. Rear who did exceptional things to care for me and keep me alive through out my child hood, for my first wife who despite a horribly dysfunctional marriage (that thank god ended) partnered with me to create two wonderful children, for my t who gave me a reason to live and have joy and laughter in my life when my divorce had left me bereft, who shares my life and love still today and serves me faithfully, and who had the compersion to open her home life, and love, to embrace as her sister heart, our beautiful swan, and to my wonderful swan who is the great soul mate and love of my life, who embraces my sadism as no one ever has, and who struggles with aspects of our life that she finds difficult to embrace but who embraces them anyway as my true and wonderful slave. Each of you in great measure made this day of life possible for me. I suspect without anyone of those in my life I would not be here.

I have a career which, in September, I will celebrate the 35th anniversary, of beginning that is unique and my intentional choice, and where I get to be leader. It gives my life great meaning and has allowed me to make peace with society.

I have always been indomitable, which has gone in large part to keeping me alive, as well as all the support of others I have recounted(and which character trait gave my adults huge challenges, and me lots of spankings, throughout my childhood.)

I too have always had this need to spank. I have no idea if I had it in April 1949, but I am sure I had it by April 1953.

So here I am.........once again. I did it! I made my 60's and I am likely the healthiest I have been in my adulthood despite chronic pain in my knee that has yet to be replaced (I haven't acquiesced to that one yet either:), and my shoulder they say needs total replacement (I think I wore it out spanking:), and my spinal stenosis (way better than it was, now, at 140 pounds lighter than before my bariatric surgery 13 months ago.) I am likely to be on to my 70's and 80's and 90's.

Thank god I am here and have had the wonderful experience of being able to be who I am. I love my life and I am proud of being in it 61 years, and to be so in love with my t and my swan. I have such good fortune and I am so grateful, in love, and loved.

All the best,

Tom

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.