Now this is really interesting. It is rare when a commenter who is so shallow as to identify herself as "Anonymous" will actually respond when challenged. I'm pretty amazed that someone who has so much of her self-worth tied up in her appearance, and who apparently feels we should hide ourselves because of our appearance, would have the temerity to decree that we are "unattractive."
Unattractive is making rude and narrow-minded coments to others about their physical anomalies. Unattractive is presuming that somehow there are body types that are good to be displayed and others that are somehow unworthy of display. Unattractive is thinking you have the capacity to judge others' appearance by something so minor as their hairstyle. (I happen to find women with cropped hair very attractive as I do women with a variety of other hairstyles).
Anonymous you are indeed very much 41. You clearly see the world from the limited perspective of your years. You may find, first of all, that over the next 15 to 20 years, your body may change in ways you will find surprising. You might find too that attractiveness for a great many mature adults is not nearly so much about appearance as it is about character, intellect, emotional authenticity and sensitivity to others, social consciousnes and ability to act with regard to it, ability to contribute to benefitting the lives of others and the community, capacity to relate intimately, sexually, and in ways that make you proud to be associated with someone you find attractive (in my case to "own" that person.)
I can only say that however much your appearance approximates the socially accepted stereotypes of beauty, your shameful comments here have portrayed the essence of unattractivenes for an adult, and if you were submissive to me I'd feel dishonored and embarassed at your behavior.
My swan has all of those attributes I mentioned in spades, and I find her hugely attractive and a source of great joy in my life. And by the way your assumption that she does not exercise or maintain a highly physically active lifestyle is mistaken.
Your need to criticize the appearance of others belies a shallowness that is indeed unattractive.
Tom
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.
Do you seek other women outside your primary relationships, and if so, what do THEY look like? Just curious.
ReplyDeleteOf course, all the attributes you mention are critically important. However, I often notice that people use their personal virtues to excuse their lack of discipline in matters of grooming, exercise and self-maintenance. Merely an observation.
ReplyDeleteOf course I am attracted to other women. Any man who says they are not is a liar. Our grooming is just fine. swan does not do herself up for a flogging as she does for a banquet.
ReplyDeleteYour attachment to the normative perspective of beauty is pretty amazing.
By the way I fantasize wondrously about the twenty-somethings I would love to spank. Amber Pixie Wells haunts my dreams. What would we talk about? What would be our attraction after a spanking or two, I love my swan more than life.
I hope you will continue to demonstrate your ignorance. It is quite entertaining, and boosting our statistics immensely.
Tom
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined.
She's not incredibly bright is she? You have feel a bit sorry for her. Because when her outside beauty fades, if indeed she possesses any, what attraction will that shallow pool hold for anyone at all?
ReplyDeleteAnd how utterly convenient to hide behind the convenience of Anonymous.
I'm a lurker and don't post but had to on this! We own bdsm-gear.com and we use REAL people BBW's and just normal people not size 2 and 4's. And we get comments like this but from MEN so I was surprised it was a woman. I thought aww just a horny net geek looking for a way to jack off and here it is a WOMAN!
ReplyDeleteAnd on that note we get way MORE compliments on our site for keeping it real, then we do about not using size 2 and 4's.
So my response..just keep it real and let this shallow *woman* (term used lightly) live in her own fantasy world.
starla
Since Tom so "cordially" invited me to continue to comment, allow me to say that I, too believe that beauty can be found in many different forms. The point I am making here is that the three of you seem to have let yourselves go. Why else would one need bariatric surgery?
ReplyDeleteI think if you are willing to appear nude online, you have opened yourselves automatically to commentary such as mine. I think people are naturally curious about the reasons you would choose to post such photos.
Saying that Swan posesses virtues far more important than physical beauty (and I do not doubt that she does, as we all do)is a cop-out, an excuse for not taking care of oneself.
At 41, I already see signs of aging and the changes that come with it. But it is my job to maintain the beauty that I have in a natural way (no botox or surgery)with exercise, proper food, and care of my skin, teeth, and hair, so I will continue to look very well into my senior years. It is a job in itself, it is time-consuming and expensive, and takes enormous discipline, but it is very worthwhile. The effort pays dividends, both professionally and personally. Any woman who does not strive to always appear at her best either doesn't know how or doesn't care. And other people will see this, which is why I am commenting.
Incidentally, I have noticed that a lot of people in blogs such as yours are very overweight. Is the majority of the community involved in this lifestyle like that?
Tom
ReplyDeleteAs I said on the first blog.
It is sad there are those in the world who really believe they must look a certain way for others to like them.When really all they need to do is be them selfs.
Master JB
I am 53 years old. Have been obese all my life. Have had 7 hernia repairs, peritonitis resulting in 8 inches of bowel removed, a temporary colostomy, colostomy reversal, sleeve gastrectomy, resulting in 80 pounds of weight loss & excess skin alllllll over my body. Based on this information, you can tell I am one physically scarred up woman. And He loves me just the way I am. I do not have to be a 41 year old size 2 with an ugly personality to be loved or protected by my Dominant. He has loved me forever and will always be the most important person and part of my life.
ReplyDeleteI have followed this note stream with disgust. "Missy A" is an embarrassment. Most people who practice BDSM are not model-types. They are real people, with real bodies, with generous personalities. "Missy A" would probably be one of the SM crowd we laugh about....the Stand & Model crowd. Gets all dressed up and strut the room like an overblown peacock. And once their Top completes their detailed area setup, complete with unloading their expensive toys, including the ever so severe bunny flogger, she trembles silently with crystal tears of shame, and he spends over an hour using the Shibari method to restrain his pretty piece. Then after all of the build-up, he spanks his perfectly coiffed and STILL DRESSED bottom for about 3 minutes while she whimpers pitifully for him to stop. And stop he does, because she has him well-trained....then he unties her, HE packs his bag of tricks and leaves the area without cleaning up after himself.
Seems to me that HE should clean up after himself completely and teach his bottom appropriate manners.
Oops....but she is only a sexual submissive....guess some people just like to fuck a pretty face, huh?
T
I am Another Anon (for various reasons to do with privacy/security issues) and I would like to quote the aforementioned Anon saying: "At 41, I already see signs of aging and the changes that come with it. But it is my job to maintain the beauty that I have in a natural way (no botox or surgery)with exercise, proper food, and care of my skin, teeth, and hair, so I will continue to look very well into my senior years."
ReplyDeleteAHAHAHAHAHA! Wait...let me catch my breath...
AHAHAHAHA!
Good luck with that, 41 year old. I remember being 41, too; I looked fabulous. Oh I WISH I looked 41 now. Oh I still work at it and, if I may say so...I still look fabulous, but...as you will see, you 41 year old vacuous idiot, your looks will not last, no matter what you do.
But I revel in the fact that you will slowly realize this and hopefully it will cause you a great deal of emotional pain as you realize nothing you do will stop Time.
Hey, you're sub, you'll handle it, right?
Just the other day I was watching the Olympics and Peggy Fleming was on. Still a beautiful woman. I thought. But everyone in the room was SHOCKED that she didn't look younger! She looked OLDER! OMG! A grandmother of four! Fit and all, oh yes, thin, fit, dressed to the teeth, no one could say otherwise but no one in the room (other than me) thought she was in any WAY attractive.
And to be honest, I would have found her much better looking if she had not had work; she has at least had botox and I found that sooooooo unattractive, but other than that I would have said she was attractive (god, I hate all the fake things women do to their bodies to look "younger") but no one else in the room (all younger than me) even noticed the botox or the clothes or how thin she was or how "fit" or anything:
They just saw "old". And they collectively said "yuck".
You, you young moron, are expressing ageism. And against your own gender. *marvels*
And it isn't pretty, your prejudice. Not at all.
The wonderful WONDERFUL thing is, you're going to find out firsthand how much it sucks to have people sum you up according to your age.
Well, assuming you don't croak first. You can always hope for that and a young 41 year old corpse in the coffin. Much better than aging, yes?
Tom, thank you for this wonderful post. I haven't the time or energy to waste on Miss Anon. It's fine to be concerned with the way you look. It is not fine to judge others.
ReplyDeleteSwan, you are beautiful - especially the parts that matter the most.
As a woman who has recently lost her breasts and her hair to cancer (yes - I have some PERMANENT hair loss) how thankful I am that people love me for my soul and not my looks.
jojo
Anonymous clearly has too much free time on her hands.
ReplyDeletePerhaps her energy would be better spent volunteering for those who are less fortunate than herself, as opposed to hiding behind the anonimoty of the internet in order to inflate her self worth by putting others down.
I would be more than happy to suggest some agencies in your area, Anonymous.
I have to agree with anonymous here. I mean, when I die, I want to be remembered for my looks and not for any of those qualities that Tom spoke about in the post. Priorities people!
ReplyDelete(is my sarcasm showing? I'm trying real hard here!)